Teatime
What I want to do, you say...
I'm not sure.
...Nothing at all.
I couldn't sleep.
It was because I couldn't forget the last thing Carnelia had said.
Even though I was lying in bed...
I could almost sense the faint fragrance of the flowers from the garden we had visited together.
My training results appear to be much better than before.
Your guidance clearly made a difference, Captain.
Would it be best to continue like this? Or should we move on to the next...
...Captain?
I was mentioning that my training results have improved thanks to your efforts.
Are you feeling all right? You look a little tired.
Oh... It's nothing.
I couldn't exactly tell her I had stayed up because I kept thinking about what she said.
...
Captain, I have a suggestion.
If you don't mind, would you care to join me for tea?
Tea?
I cannot claim to be an expert on tea, but it is one of the things I love.
And so... I had always thought I should offer you some one day.
We likely won't have many chances to take it easy after a while, and the Journey is progressing smoothly.
Her suggestion came unexpectedly, but there was no reason to turn her down.
She had been handling training perfectly, and thanks to that, we were making quick progress.
Unlike the early days of the Journey, taking one day to relax shouldn't be an issue.
My room has a tea set and tea leaves prepared.
Would you come with me?
Despite her modest claim that she was no expert, she prepared the tea with remarkable skill.
The room filled with a fresh, rich fragrance that called to mind soil and flowers.
Fufu, does it? Then it was worth offering it to you after all.
I wondered which tea to serve you, and chose tea leaves that may help with fatigue.
I hoped it might help you recover from your fatigue, even if only slightly.
Wait... fatigue?
...I tried to hide it, but apparently, it seemed my condition was more obvious than I realized.
You seemed unusually absentminded today, Captain.
You confused the schedule, and even brought the wrong training equipment.
So I suspected you may not have slept well.
It's the same as the care you show me, Captain.
I am merely doing my part as your Journey member.
After all, this Journey belongs to only you and me.
Are you usually the type to look after people around you?
Fufu, I'm not sure.
I do not think I can say that I am with confidence myself.
However... there was a time when people often said that about me.
...All the more so during my time at Candle Square.
The instant she brought up Candle Square, Carnelia's expression darkened.
Perhaps... I might be able to learn more about who she truly was.
...
I wonder if you remember the day we first met.
And... what I said you that day.
I'm certain you have many questions for me.
I have no intention of hiding everything from you, so I'll tell you little by little.
Yes. Our Journey has only just begun, after all.
We still have an entire year ahead of us.
That should be more than enough time.
If it's you, Captain...
I feel as though you might be able to see me as who I am.
Carnelia carefully removed her cape.
...!
Countless marks stood out against her pale skin.
Though old and faint, they were unmistakably traces of someone who had struggled to escape life itself.
No one who beheld Carnelia's secret could ever speak of it lightly.
As you are aware, I was born the eldest daughter of the Rhys family.
I had to regard death as sacred, and guide those walking their final path.
As the eldest daughter, it was my duty to live in service of my family's fate.
But... there was a fatal flaw within me.
...I was born bearing the curse of immortality.
The curse of immortality?
It's an ancient curse passed down from a distant ancestor of our family.
Anyone affected by it is made incapable of death, no matter how much they long for it.
It was... deeply ironic.
I was born into a family meant to be closer to death than any other...
And yet I was farther from death than anyone.
...I did. Because I tried very, very hard.
The truth is, very few people know about my condition.
I could have kept it hidden if that was what I wanted.
But because of my condition... perhaps I felt compelled to push myself even further.
I had no choice but to master my family's hexomancy in order to find a way to break the curse.
Since I was different from others from the very beginning, I thought I had to work harder to stand among them.
Goodness, you've already mastered the entire hexomancy manual!
Ms. Carnelia is clearly the one to become the heiress of the family!
How can Ms. Carnelia be so kind and beautiful?
Did you hear? The NOA branch was named the best Candle Square in all of Lavistar.
It's all thanks to Ms. Carnelia, of course!
People gave me praise and admiration far beyond what I deserved.
That praise and admiration never brought me joy, but...
At the very least, it helped me conceal my true self.
And... receiving praise like that made me feel as if my life was a little more normal.
Before long, I had become Master Maid.
The seed had been buried in the mud from the very beginning.
Struggling to draw nutrients however it could.
So that it could bloom just like the others, or perhaps even more beautifully.
And so, the seed struggled with all it had.
Candle Square began as my duty as the firstborn, but I did have one expectation.
It was a place where countless people passed through, and countless voices could be heard.
Since my position allowed me to gather information easily, I believed I would soon find a way to break the curse.
But... on the other hand.
Watching all those people pass through Candle Square made me feel something.
But the seed that had bloomed into a flower...
Had no way of knowing that storm clouds had gathered in the sky.
Their yearning for life, and the countless emotions they experience...
I realized what I lacked was something I had never had... a normal life.
...A crack began to form in the fate that had hounded me all my life.
...A crack, you say.
...Perhaps you may not be able to understand.
The truth is, I did not care for the flowers because I liked them or their scent.
What do you mean?
...It was before I had ever set foot in the garden.
One day, the maids were planting flowers in the garden.
They talked about what they had planted that day, and how the ones from before had begun to sprout.
And they laughed as they shared those stories.
They said watching the lives they had planted grow season after season made them feel fulfilled somehow.
...
Captain.
When you plant flowers and watch them grow...
Do you feel the same way?
As I looked into her eyes, I couldn't bring myself to lie and say no.
I still do not understand that feeling.
I simply believed that making the garden more beautiful would also benefit Candle Square.
That sense of fullness that comes so naturally to others...
Was a feeling forever beyond my reach.
...Fufu, yes. That is how it was.
If feelings like that had never existed to begin with, perhaps I could have accepted it.
Just as you said, I continued testing myself, disguising it as a hobby.
Needless to say... I found no answer.
The many emotions held by those who passed through Candle Square.
The happiness of watching flowers take root and bloom.
All those things she lacked eventually came down to one thing.
...Yes, just like you said.
A normal life.
I supposed I wanted to live a life just like everyone else.
In that sense, I wanted to be like those who visited Candle Square.
To shine while one lives...
And then... meet my end, fading into darkness.
Normalcy.
For something so simple to one person, yet so deeply lacking to another...
What could I do for her?
Fufu... I seem to have gone on about myself for too long.
If the chance comes, I hope we may enjoy tea together like this again.
Perhaps next time, our conversation can be a little lighter.
Carnelia, wait.
...
...
I would surely hope for it.
...Even if it were only a part of it.
A breeze swept through Candle Square.
Between us, along with the faint fragrance of tea leaves.